The problem(s) with gluten-free -OR- The cinnamon bun that broke my heart

Let me begin by telling you - I am a lover of cinnamon buns (cb)-a true connoisseur.  BC (before Celiac), it was my #1 pick when at a bakery (apple fritters and/or carrot cake were close runner ups).  When it came to cbs, I had strict standards -I wouldn't just eat any cb. I liked the soft doughy cbs that were short and wide, with the right balance of cinnamon and raisins, loosely rolled and topped with a thick smear of cream cheese icing.  The very best I had was at a hole-in-the-wall bakery in a folksy neighbourhood in Victoria that was big on patchouli and hemp (hmmmm, what was in that cb?)  The specific qualities are hazy - all I remember is washing it down with a glass of tart limeade and thinking, now THIS is a cb!  I have never found one of equal comparison -and after the diagnoses, I feared I never would.  And so I wandered, searching the flour-less trails, like a character in Kung Fu (David Carradine, not the fat Jack Black Panda) for the elusive gf cb....


And then, out of no where, there it was.  Covered in a rich dollop of dense cream cheese icing, disguised as a muffin/cupcake (a hybrid?), the cb winked at me from the display case as if to say ....okay, I was deliriously happy.  I promptly ordered one with a coffee, grabbed a seat and was ready to succumb to my cravings; however, within the first bite, I was bitch-slapped awake.  The cb was dense, dry and hard, like a baby boulder....and the bakery had only been open for an hour or so, so it wasn't the case of getting yesterday's product.  The bun was more like a hearty bread then a fluffy cloud-and that is one of the biggest negatives of gf baked goods. GF baking can be crumbly, dry, tasteless, heavy, flat -all the qualities that can put a girl off her baked goods.  Yes, it can be trial-and-error at times....much like Carmen Diaz's film choices (have you seen Bad Teachers?).


As I gnawed my way along the side of the dense cb, I realized that, despite all best intentions, some gf foods just don't compare. You win some, you loose some. In the end, I ate about half of the cb.....but I ate all the icing-that was always the best part anyways.